It's the Small Stuff After All

As one of my favorite Instagram pages puts it, its the small stuff that will elevate your existence. (@bossbabe.inc if you're curious)

Your morning ritual

The way you talk to yourself

The books you read

The pages you follow

Who you share your energy with

The actions above are small

in comparison to the grander scheme of my day when listed individually. It is however the wholistic combination of these practices that lend the power to guide my outlook and shift the trajectory of my day. Done with intention and kindness towards myself, these practices end up giving me the confidence to carpe the diem, if you will.

If you grew up anything like me (with an intensely positive, pretty scary, always means well, tough-love kind of mom) you might have been taught that it’s the big moves that meaningfully change your life and propel you forward towards your dreams. That the success of those changes provokes a ripple effect on your world. The farther those ripples reached, the better of a person I felt I was. The larger the impact, the larger the celebration. The ever-building competition I had established with myself to one-up each celebration became unsustainable and anxiety ridden. My incessant need to take an all-or-nothing approach to life was becoming more of a barrier to success than a positive type-A character trait. Examples - I didn’t want to leave my okay job unless it was for the BIGGEST upgrade in salary possible. I didn’t want to speak up at work unless I had something MONUMENTAL to say. I didn’t want to start a morning routine unless it was planned out to a TEE (are we sensing a theme here?) I didn’t want to start a company unless it was going to CHANGE THE WORLD immediately. I didn’t want to write this blog post unless I could ensure it blew minds and saved lives.

Everyone is inclined to their own beliefs, and by no means would I say that what I was taught growing up was wrong. For me personally however, this mindset and approach doesn’t work…and that’s okay! Life is all about individual experiences and learning as we go. I simply found this approach to be staggeringly crippling. As a semi-shy, glass-half-full, creative extrovert perfectionist, all I was left with were a million ideas and all the doubt in the world that none of my ideas were big enough.

What I have come to learn for myself,

is that the big wins that count…that are truly transformational… are often a culmination of all the little wins. The kind words I’ve learned how to tell myself give me those little confidence boosts that help me conquer my fears and anxieties throughout the day, keep me motivated to accomplish my bigger goals, and ultimately allow me to work towards manifesting all the good things I have intended for my life.

Here's what some of that inner dialogue sounds like:

“Pay attention to the little things, they add up to the big things. You. Do. You.”

“Set yourself up the best way you know how every morning.”

“Listen to how you talk to yourself and try to keep it positive and full of love.”

“Choose what your brain is consuming wisely – books, Instagram, the news, screen time in general.”

“Know who fills your cup and who empties it and find the balance that works for you.”

I learned an important lesson from one of my favorite entrepreneurs, Sophia Amoruso… your first anything is going to suck, just get over that. (If you can’t tell, she’s blunt and I love it). She said what so many others have said before her, just in a real girl-bossy way… no one has gotten anywhere without their first janky website or their first dimly lit video. If we are too scared of the first step not going %100 the way we planned, the place we go instead is nowhere.

On this, my advice to myself is to just fucking start the thing. You don’t have to be good at it, you just have to like it. Film your first video. Write the first chapter of your book. Design your first video game idea. Draw your first illustration. Make your first recipe. Take your first lesson. It's the small stuff after all...

So...

Where are you getting in your own way?

What are you going to start now that you've been dragging your feet on?

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, we can take those first baby steps together. :)

xoxo,

Trishae